Life what is it?

It is a long road of decisions-

Right or left..

Black or White..

Love or hate..

Smile or Frown...

Life is such a delicate thing..

so beautiful yet burtal

it can be constant yet unknown

It can be gone in a blink of an eye..

all the things you hoped and planned for gone.

You try to plan for the future yet live in the moment.

You never know what tomorrow brings..

what challanges you will be faced with.

Make a good decision that you will have to live out

for the rest of your life.

Which you don't know how long that will be.

Life is like fine China.

Beautiful in the cabinet...

but you don't get its full use

until you use it..

Admire it when you drink you

favorite hot drink.

Learn from yesterday

Live for today

and Leave tomorrow where it is...

Well another year has passed and WoW!!
I am so glad to see another birthday, getting older is a
disease that I hope I will never get cured.
My sister came to visit and I am sooo thankful.
I needed a family dose...

Beauty

To say to be cut and bald, sick and weak is beautiful for most would say absurd.
But there is a beauty in strength a beauty not seen before.
A beauty in seeing what things in life are truly important.
Beauty in every sense of the word.
Not what is portrayed in today's media.
Inner, Core, Central
being able to look beyond the obvious and see
beauty that your eyes could never visualize.
The beauty that you see now in others that somehow you overlooked
in the past.
The beauty in those who help you thru this journey.
The beauty that you get when you wake up each morning.
That beauty in your little girls eyes,
You began to cherish every moment.
taking nothing for granted.
The beauty in the word survivor
So, yes when you are faced with life changing decisions and sleepless nights
Feeling like you are wearing a 100 lb steel jacket after chemo
crawling on the bathroom floor at 3am in the morning.
Yes that is truly beautiful because you are doing what it takes to be....

A New Road

Uneven Lanes

Lanes that have suddenly been changed
Somehow uneven, unlevel, unknown
Lanes that have somehow become uncomfortable to drive
Lanes that have suddenly caused much pain and suffering to all those
who are riding with me in this life.
Lanes that are somehow/someway changed
Lane that you don't know the destination
Lanes that have scared and frightened the passengers
I have left the paved smooth roads of confidence and security..
And somehow found my way here....

Looking to the Future

I say looking to future as if you can really see what the future holds.
You live today like you know what is coming tomorrow..
You prepare what you will wear tomorrow and what's for dinner.
If you don't plan for the future will that change it?

Not really you just aren't as prepared>>
But then again how can you really prepare for the unknown?
You really can't you have to fake it when something happens that shakes your world.
You hope all the experiences that you have faced in the past will help you deal with the
challenges in the future.
They sometimes fall short.
And when they do you form a new defensive system. New coping mechanisms, new
ways of coping. Or at least telling yourself that you will be a better person because
of the opportunities to grow will somehow make you stronger, smarter, better to handle
what lies ahead.
That is what makes you successful at life having a strategy, a angle, next move. Looking for
the next challenge and preparing for the move you will make if your (opponent=problem) tries to block or stop you. Sometimes life surprises you and make another move one that you did not
even see. Then your skills come into play how will you handle it, walk away from the game?
Not a chance....
What helps you cope with life's opponents?

Finding Me...

many people talk about finding themselves.
What does that really mean? Are you lost or wandering aimlessly just taking life as
it comes?
I think that you have to reach within yourself and perhaps go to some dark places
to find yourself.
For me it is more about listening to my inner self. That self that I always tell to shut up..or ignore the voice to do or not to do something.
However, the more you listen to the inner self you build that trust, especially when you are not caught up with self doubt and insecurity.
I think it is about trust...trust that you will make the right decision and if it is not the right decision not fall apart.
What do you think?
How can you find your inner self?

New Horizons

Well it has been quite a while since my last post.

My sister Abbigail inspired me to continue my spot.

The last few months have been one of healing not just my body but also

my mind. The process of renewal and regeneration has felt some growing pains.

Thinking back over my life the decisions I made and then the ones that

I did not make. I was reading a poem that my best friend cut out of the news paper

called I believe..

I believe -

that no matter how good a friend is , they're going to hurt you every

once in a while and you must forgive them for that



I believe -

that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.



I believe -

that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.



I believe -

that you can keep going long after you think you can.



I believe -

that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.



I believe -

that either you control your attitude or it controls you.



I believe -

that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the

best time.



I believe -

that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world does not

stop for your grief.



I believe -

that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are

responsible for who we become.



I believe -

that your life can be changed in matter of hours by people who

don't even know you.



I believe -

that when you take a chance on someone you will always find a surprise.



I think about this and take some time to reflect...

As Emerson put it

"What lies before us and behind us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."



I don't think I had enough strength within my self of withstand all the disappointments however

I was surprised with the help of the creator I am a better person.